In Katie's Words

Yesterday we met with my recommended oncologist. It's a surreal feeling walking into the office, as I am by far the youngest patient in there. I'm surrounded by warriors in their 60's or later. I'm not saying 60 is old, because it's not, but as a 44 year old woman, I felt out of place. I really shouldn't be here, I'm still waiting for someone to apologetically tell me they've made a mistake. And it would be totally fine. Keep the tits and the cancer. No harm no foul. No such luck. Met with my oncologist. Turns out he was part of the tumor board that discussed my case at length the week prior. While we are still waiting for the final Oncotype score, he tells us his professional advice, which was mutual among the board. First, Oncotype score basically provides a risk assessment based on characteristics of each individuals cancer. Tumor size, how aggressive  it is, where it is, the health and age of patient, etc. It helps doctors determine what type of trea...

We are meeting with the oncologist today to discuss my customized treatment plan moving forward. Before all of that, I want to take a moment to really thank ALL of you for your continued love, support and well wishes. The Sherman family would not be able to navigate this road if it wasn’t for friends and family, near and far. We are humbled by the messages, texts, calls, cards, flowers, food, and offers to help in any way possible. This includes people that have reached out that we don't even know personally. We are so lucky to have such a strong support system near us that allow us to keep life moving, especially for the kids.  My parents, who coincidentally moved back to Huntley from Michigan in November. They’ve been so gracious in picking up kids from the bus, feeding them dinner, getting them to/from baseball and keeping them overnight when I was in the hospital.  Brian’s parents, driving down from Tomah to stay with us for a week, making sure dinner is on the table and k...

Seems like Groundhog Day. Wake up, get kids ready for school, get them to bus and get in car to hospital. Didn’t I JUST do this 2 weeks ago? Sure did. This time, I’ll be walking out lopsided, missing my right nipple. No more titty twisting me, at least on the right side, for now. I’ve heard you get them tattooed on after?!?! Stay tuned for that!  I’m getting texts in the morning, wishing me well, and honestly, I’m over it. Get whatever cancer or threat of cancer out of me. A friend texting me good luck, I respond with, “They can take my nipple, but they’ll never take my FREEDOM” and coupled that with the William Wallace GIF from Braveheart. Why not.  I’m not sure who watched Mad Men, but Brian and I did. One of the last seasons a crazy copywriter falls in love with his boss. To show how much he loves her, he cuts off his nipple and puts it in a box for her. I offered that to Brian this morning. He laughed, as did I. Only us.  This is him (don't recall name) handing Peggy...

I’m healing great. Only took paid meds for about 5 days. I’m moving around more, while also getting in trouble from hubby by doing so. Since posting on FB, I’ve had even more of an outreach from friends that have either been through exactly the same diagnosis, or something similar. It’s been amazing. I’m able to ask questions I didn’t know to ask before. I think I said this in a previous post, but I will forever be tied to these warrior women that so graciously reach out to me and I am so thankful for everyone.  My ducks are still following me. I’m hoping I’ll be able to get these darn tubes out soon. They’re annoying and I can’t wear any shirt unless it’s a button up, because I can’t lift my arms with these tubes. Over all though, we’re in the clear.  Then the phone call from the surgeon with final pathology results. Brian happens to be sitting next to me, so I put it on speaker.  There has been a plot twist. That fucking plot twist. First, they identified ALH (Atypical ...

So I've often thought before, if I could just loose a little weight in my big boobs I could wear button shirts. Well, I didn't literally it mean, if it meant losing the weight this way! While my amazing husband spent the weekend in Iowa, freezing, at a baseball tournament (can't thank him enough for tackling that) I spent the weekend prepping. Prepping for what I won't be able to do after surgery. Prepping for family that will come and stay with us to help with the kids. Laundry, dishes, shopping, prepping beds, lunches and having my last glass of wine for a while. It was a bottle, shut up. I had 9,000 steps and barely left the house. I earned that bottle. Woke up April 11th feeling pretty OK. Still not reality for me. I started with my normal routine, getting the kids ready for school and getting them to the bus stop.  Now it's time. Brian and I head to the hospital. It's like I want to just be there, but also just want to keep driving. Everyone that we meet t...

We’ve done our best, or so we thought, of letting the kids know what’s going on. We tell them based on what would be age appropriate. Evan is 12 and Jesse is 7. You have to handle them differently. Brian did most of the talking, and I stepped in with, do you have any questions. We sometimes don’t give kids enough credit to figure out for themselves what’s going on. That’s what happened on April 6th. I came home from from taking Evan to baseball practice and noticed the flag up on our mailbox. Jesse normally gets the mail, he calls it ‘his job’. I assumed he put the flag up being silly. So I went to check the mailbox and what I found… Almost brought me to my knees.  Dear Mom, I hope you are OK at the doter. I love you. I hope you have a gerate day.  He was already in bed, so I knew I needed to talk to him the next morning. And hold it together damn-it! That next morning, I told him I got his letter and I loved how he was thinking of me. At first he was confused. He wanted to ma...

Family is everything. Not much else to say there. It started with a girls trip, my mom and I, headed to Tomah to have a girls night with my mother-in-law. I was met with wine, flowers and cheesecake, my favorite. There might have also been some Old Fashions mixed in and of course a beer with my Father-in-law before he escaped to the basement.  I am so fortunate to have such an amazing and fun family that in the midst of all the chaos they will still load up a laundry basket of necessities (because apparently that's easier than bags) and drive an hour for a sleepover. It's not all about my boobs though, although they were the hit of the party.  Growing up I had only one girl cousin, Kristin. We grew up 2,000 miles away, me in California and her in Illinois. She is and will always be my 'soul sister'. Her husband and my husband have an amazing bromance and our kids can't seem to get enough of each other. We also have an honorary sister, Becky. Not blood related, but I...

Our next meeting with our surgeon is really just confirmation from what we already knew. That everything she assumed with my cancer in my right breast was true, the disease is just all over my right breast and there is no way to remove the cancer with a lumpectomy. Then there is a plot twist, there are TWO “suspicious spots” where there is slight concern the cancer might have become invasive. Ugh. Stupid plot twist. Also, that the little old mass/cyst they were monitoring from my original ultrasound on February 1 had “grown significantly” (those exact words are in the final report). If there was any good news, it was that the MRI showed a clear picture of my lymph nodes and those looked good.  Now it was our turn to talk. The surgeon turned to us to get our thoughts on how we wanted to proceed. I tell her we think the best way forward is a double mastectomy. Wow! There it was, I literally just requested a double mastectomy. I wasn’t ready for the surgeon to say, “we need to do thi...

Not much to say about my experience with the MRI. Pretty clinical, I was sick of being emotional about having another exam. So I just went through the motions. I have a cousin who is an Xray Tech, she was messaging me leading up to the MRI and really talked me through what she thought I’d experience. It made me feel confident walking in and not scared. Brian was of course with me the entire time. I had to lay on a table face down with my arms out like Superman. I can see the resemblance. You lay still for about 30 minutes while the machine sounds like it’s missing some ball-bearings and screeches, and cracks and I might have even heard the bass for some popular songs. Done. What’s next on the list? Wait 3-5 days for results. Right. Two days later, I get a call from my surgeons office to schedule our next appointment and go over results.

I start telling friends and family. Well, really, I tell my parents and Brian’s parents and let them pass the news on. Talking about it sometimes chokes me up, and I’d rather not do that. Brian is a co-host on a Chicago radio station, 97.1FM The Drive. Every Monday he and his co-host, Tingle, call the wives and we grade them for how they were as husbands over the weekend. Hilarity usually ensues, but not this particular Monday. I tell Brian in advance that I want to mention it on the radio. It’s something that is going to be a big part of our lives and to be honest, our lives spill over onto the radio. If I can get just one person to think, wow, I can’t remember the last time I had a mammogram, I better schedule one, I’ve helped.  It's my turn to grade Brian and he gets an A+. I explain that we’ve had some personal things going on and Brian’s support and love for me is nothing less than perfect. I do my best to squeak out telling them about my doctor appointments and yadda, yadda,...

Brian and I met with the surgeon. Coincidentally the surgeon was the same surgeon that performed an emergency appendectomy on Brian. What are the chances?!?!? I liked her immediately. She spoke to us with positive reinforcement on the good things, but was realistic on the bad things. I was stage 0 DCIS. I also had ALH, which is Atypical Lobular Hyperplasia. What’s that? Glad you asked, because so did I. It is not cancer, but it increases the risk of breast cancer. If they continue to accumulate and become more abnormal it can transition into breast cancer. So that doesn’t sound good. They ask lots of family genetic questions, trying to see if there is something, anything, that would make me higher risk for breast cancer. As far as I know though, there is no breast cancer, no ovarian cancer and no uterine cancer in my family. She wants me to get genetic testing to test for the BRCA gene, which if you have basically means at some point you too will be in this situation as long as you hav...

As the week was coming to a close, or shall I say, as 3-5 days were nearing the end, Brian always made sure to ask if I had heard from the Dr. He came home from work Friday afternoon and asked. To say the words out loud, while looking in someone’s eyes, was when I felt a waterfall of emotion collapse me. I told him the news. They said I have breast cancer, but it’s NON-invasive, only in my ducts. I’ve already called the surgeon they referred me to and I’ve got our appointment to talk to her about next steps. He held gently, yet tight. It was perfect. His comforting voice, “we’re going to talk to the surgeon and everything is going to be OK. I love you and I’m with you.” I always know he’s with me.  I talked with a close friend, extensively, who had to have a lump removed before. Her positivity convinced me my experience would be the same. The surgeon will tell me I need a lumpectomy. It will be an outpatient surgery and I’ll get Starbucks after because I’ll have deserved that $8 co...

“We’ll call you in 3-5 days.” So is it like closer to 3 or closer to 5? Is this business days or just regular days? Like, should I count Saturday and Sunday? What if a holiday falls during the 3-5 days? It was 5 business days. I got the call in between the boys piano lessons and baseball practice. I’m glad I got the call. It was 6:30p and I doubt they would have left a detailed message. In both biopsies they found ductal carcinoma in situ, AKA Breast Cancer. HOWEVER, we caught it super early, and it was only in my ducts. If there is any type of breast cancer to have, it’s this one. Kinda feels like you should be relieved, but then again also devasted. I was told to follow up with a general surgeon to talk about my options for next steps. I didn’t cry that night, not that I can remember. Brian, my husband, was working and I wasn’t going to share the news with him over the phone. I texted a couple close friends, totally blew it off like it wasn’t much to worry about because it wasn’t ‘re...

Today’s the day I’ll flash my boobs again and still get no beads. Come on, we don’t always have to be so serious. I’m pretty comfortable heading into the hospital for the biopsy, in fact I’m hoping it goes quick because we’re going to head to CarMax after and trade in our car. Craving some Hooters (no pun intended) buffalo shrimp and beer after that. Obviously, I’m calm.  This biopsy procedure will be different from the one I had previously. In 2020, I laid on my back, and the tech watched on a monitor while he inserted the needle to the desired area and then you feel a tug, which is grabbing a sample of the tissue and voilà, biopsy collected. If you’re wondering if I asked to look at it, of course I did. It looked like someone blew their nose. You’re welcome.  Today’s biopsy would be different. I was positioned on my stomach while my boob went through a hole on the table. The table then lifts up so that the doctors are literally sitting on chairs with my big boob hanging abov...

I go in for an ultrasound. Same process, come in smelly, put clothes in locker, figure out which way to wear the gown and get an ultrasound. This time felt a little different. The tech seemed to be pushing harder than I remember from the year prior, just to make sure she’s able to see everything clearly and take screenshots as needed. There was one spot where, while she was pushing with the ‘wand’, I felt what I can only describe as a pop. She says, “have you ever felt that lump?” I tell her, in all honesty, “not until just now when you pushed on it”. Now, I may not be the best at properly giving myself at home checks, but I’m pretty sure my husband would feel a lump. Hey-o! The benefit of these ultrasounds is that they have a radiologist to look at the scans immediately and tell you their thoughts/findings. I’m dressed and in the office waiting for results. “You have very dense breasts”, they began. Thanks, so I've been told. They continue by telling me they’ve noticed calcifica...

It’s that time of year, actually, I was a little overdue for my annual mammogram. Life happens, we get busy, and moms tend to put everyone else’s appointments first. I know the routine, it’s not my first rodeo (By the way, if you get annoyed with puns and cliché phrases, feel free to exit the blog now). Still with me? Super. Here we go. Undress, get a whiff of yourself because you’re not allowed to have deodorant on, and then put an oversized gown that I can never remember if it’s supposed to be open in the front or the back. It’s usually appropriately colored pink. Go into the exam room where a woman oddly grabs your boobs and positions them on a shelf for their photoshoot. A machine gradually lowers to ever so lightly squish your boob. If you’ve had a mammogram before, I hope you at least laughed at that description. There is no such thing as ‘every so lightly’ squishing your boob during a mammogram, that’s the point of it. To make sure it’s securely on your boob to get the best p...

Katie's Breast Cancer Journey  Have You Squeezed Your Boobs Lately? My life was forever changed on March 4th, 2022, when I got the phone call that I was diagnosed with Stage 0 Ductal Carcinoma in Situ (DCIS). In case you don't know, because I didn't, that means Breast Cancer. It was NON-invasive and apparently, if you ever get breast cancer, it's the one you want. I thought this was just a bump in the road, something easily taken care of and I could continue to go about my life. In fact, I had finally gotten back into the workforce 4 days prior to this call. Now this? My only thought was, let's just deal with it and move on. Probably a lumpectomy at an outpatient office and and I'll have a glass of wine when I get home. But that's just not how it happened. Not. At. All. March 4th was only the beginning of the shit-show now only I was in, but my husband, my two boys, my family. After many ugly cries, and laughs, because laughing really does help, I decided I ...