January 11, 2022: MAMMOGRAM DAY

It’s that time of year, actually, I was a little overdue for my annual mammogram. Life happens, we get busy, and moms tend to put everyone else’s appointments first. I know the routine, it’s not my first rodeo (By the way, if you get annoyed with puns and cliché phrases, feel free to exit the blog now). Still with me? Super. Here we go. Undress, get a whiff of yourself because you’re not allowed to have deodorant on, and then put an oversized gown that I can never remember if it’s supposed to be open in the front or the back. It’s usually appropriately colored pink. Go into the exam room where a woman oddly grabs your boobs and positions them on a shelf for their photoshoot. A machine gradually lowers to ever so lightly squish your boob. If you’ve had a mammogram before, I hope you at least laughed at that description. There is no such thing as ‘every so lightly’ squishing your boob during a mammogram, that’s the point of it. To make sure it’s securely on your boob to get the best picture. The woman tells me to hold my breath while the machine takes a picture. Is it just me, or do you also smile? I mean, just in case right? Always smile for pictures. Every year that I have gone for a mammy I’m told I have dense breasts. The first time I heard it, I was like, “is that a compliment?” I had no idea. Apparently it’s not good. It means they have a harder time reading the mammogram results. So what usually happens next is I get a phone call a day or so later and I’m told I need to come in for an ultrasound so they can get a better visual. It happened in 2020 as well. Mammogram, come back, ultrasound, oops, we see something that we’d like to biopsy. Come back for biopsy and it’s benign. Again, that was 2020. Hopefully you’re still following me, this is my first blog. OK. So I get the mammy, two days later I get the call to come back for ultrasound. I literally write it in my calendar as “Katie boob check… again 🙄.”